NigeBlog

Saturday 14th August

Aston Villa 3, West Ham 0. 18th place. Yup, a new season of English Premier League football started today. 

Thursday 12th August

43 today. Jan and the girls were very generous. I was horribly self absorbed. Feeling better now. Listening to The Best Punk Album in the World Ever 2, an inspired gift from Jan. Very school disco. And watching the Perseids. Thank you god for lighting the heavens on my birthday.

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Meant to link to this ages ago -- this guy made our new Samsung Netbook useable:
http://www.sammynetbook.com/tips/finding-your-netbook-trackpad-hard-to-use-read-these-essential-tips

Thursday 20th May

Lucy question: If a fire engine and a school bus were married together which one do you think would be the girl ?

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I have been thinking again about why I like old comics. I was reading an interview in Mome where the artist's dad was a musician in California and used to take him to comic shops in the 70s and buy Marvels, DCs, Warren mags, undergrounds and Heavy Metal. Good taste for someone in the 1970s I thought. And then I realised: collecting old comics is like travelling back to a time when you would have had good taste. To be honest I can't keep up with all the artists in Mome, but I do know I like Eerie and Creepy and the Fantastic Four and the Avengers and Robert Crumb and Moebius.

Tuesday 11th May

Zola sacked. Frazetta dead. Cameron prime minister. What a shit day.

Friday 7th May

I campaigned for the Labour party, against the tories and against cuts and I don't feel too unhappy. We won in East Lothian, we won in Scotland and the tories haven't didn't win enough to rule in Westminster. Interesting times.

Monday 3rd May

Had to work today but I'm loving Back to the Phuture on Radio 6. All the tunes they used to play between bands at gigs, like Coup and Timezone World Destruction and Shack Up. Nice one.

Friday 30th April

Its impossible to be anything other than happy jogging round the school playground with Lucy and Georgie and loads of other kids / parents / teachers for Scottish Health week (or something).

Tuesday 27th April

Enjoying JPod by Douglas Coupland. Why do I like reading about snarky kids working IT and talking about comics and maths and shit ? Maybe someone should write a book about kids who grow up a bit and become parents and are slightly less snarky and geeky than they used to be.

Particularly liked this but on page 103: "If you're smart you're either the only person in your family who's smart, or everybody in your family is smart. No in-between". That's us Barkers !

Monday 26th April

Finished Apples by Richard Milward. I enjoyed it -- it reminded me of school and going to the pub and wanting a girlfriend and what a sad case I used to be, and I really wanted the Adam and Eve characters to rise above their situation and get romantic, but eek, I'm a parent now and the way these kids carry on is a bit disturbing.

Sunday 25th April

A double lentil day -- puy lentils and one minute ciabatta for lunch, Gits Dal Vada and bombay potato for tea.

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Burnley 0 Liverpool 4. West Ham are safe. Now for Labour to win the election and England to win the World Cup.

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I like this guy's strand on the first 23 ever gigs he ever went to: link. I remember once sitting in a Physics exam listing the first 200 bands I hads ever seen. I'm not sure my memory could reproduce that list now, and unlike John Eden I didn't keep the ticket stubs all these years. 

Saturday 24th April

My best day of parenting ever. Each child assigned 30 minutes of one on one Dad time in return for doing chores. Job done.

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Hull 0 Sunderland 1. West Ham 3 Wigan 2. We might just make it. Burnley play Liverpool tomorrow.

Friday 23rd April

Spotify play list, partially inspired by today's Guradian:

The Jam – Monday
Gorillaz – On Melancholy Hill
LCD Soundsystem – Daft Punk Is Playing At My House
Galaxie 500 – Strange
Hüsker Dü – Don't Want To Know If You Are Lonely
Doves – Last Broadcast
Broadcast – Tender Buttons
Section 25 – Inspiration
Northside – Shall We Take A Trip?
Happy Mondays – Hallelujah
Black Flag – Rise Above
Joey Beltram – Energy Flash
Minutemen – Corona
Ken Saydak – Jam Night

Then excellent Dr Feelgood gig from 1977 on BBC4 Sight and Sound. Lee Brilleaux rocked.

Wednesday 21st April

Me still having problems with wireless on Fedora. Maybe this guide will help:

http://fedorasolved.org/Members/MrHappy/troubleshooting

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Aston Villa beat Hull City. Did West Ham big favour.

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Listening to Section 25 on Spotify. Another band that I have only listened to since reading a Guardian obituary.

Monday 12th April

Hurrah, we can the BBC news channel again ! Jan bought a Freeview box for £1 and I can confirm for anyone who may doubt, Freeview works just fine in Prestonpans. Shame I'd already spent £18 on a replacement Freesat box.

Saturday 10th April

Hull 1 Burnley 4. West Ham 1 Sunderland 0. We might just make it.

Friday 9th April

A three dream night:

1. I am getting a telling off from my boss. My workmate is crying. I am pleading.
2. I am reading on old 2000AD from the 80s and in the Judge Dredd story there is a bespectacled young boy called Harry Potter. I think this was inspired by recently reading that Harold Potter was a character in Lost Girls. 
3. Jan and I have bought Waterstones in Princes Street as our new home. Our furniture and stuff looks great in the big setting and we're very happy but we haven't sold our old house yet and the mortgage payments are due and we can't afford it.

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Lucy's dream:
I was rich and had loads of money and people were around me and I was all happy and I was singing the Tikabilla Jive in my head.

Monday 5th April

New Dr Who on Saturday night lived up to very high expectations. Only bit I didn't like was the Independance Day style computer virus bit.

Also liked the Adam Buxton Big Mixtape on Radio 6. Jan and Emily didn't but the Guardian agrees with me -- review here.

Sunday 4th April

Tories try to limit damage as Grayling says B&Bs should be able to bar gay people

but what if you're gay and you don't like Christians staying in your B&B ?

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David Mitchell on the proposed change to British Summer Time (full article here):

Let me illustrate what the change would mean: since the clocks have gone forward, Channel 4 has been broadcasting its 7 o'clock news at 7pm GMT+1, while Channel 4+1 shows it an hour later at 7pm GMT, just like Channel 4 does in winter, when Channel 4+1 is on GMT minus 1. Under the new system, Channel 4+1 will swap to GMT (not plus 1) in the winter – while Channel 4 (not plus 1) is on GMT+1 – but it'll move to GMT+1 in summer, when the main channel's on plus 2. Clear?

And from John Tuck on the letters page:

The change from the Julian to the Gregorian calendar in 1752 was made for sound astronomical reasons. The adoption of Greenwich Mean Time for the whole country was made for practical reasons, but results in all the parts of Britain west of the Greenwich meridian using a clock that says 12 o'clock midday up to half an hour before the Sun reaches its zenith. British summertime compels people living in Cornwall, the west of Wales and Scotland to pretend that midday occurs at 10.30am by astronomically correct time. Why should they should work to a system of double summertime that puts midday at 9.30am, for the convenience of Londoners?

If the Scots have the option of sending their children to school an hour later, by the same token, the southern English have the option of sending their children to school an hour earlier. Is it fair to question why we don't like the idea of sending children to school at 8am, but are quite happy to do it if 8am is called 9am?

As an English person living in Scotland I cannot support the proposed change to BST.
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Everton 2 West Ham 2 -- finally a point.

Wednesday 17th February

Sol Campbell scores for Arsenal against Porto.

Listening to War Child Heroes from the library, which doesn't really help ex child soldiers from the Democratic Republic of Congo, but it is a good record.

And eating a Toffee Crisp. I can resist anything but temptation.

A good night all told.

Tuesday 16th February

A few weeks ago Lucy Mangan wrote about how she only had enough life left to read 3000 books. Link here. This morning I awoke with the shocking thought that maybe I didn't have enough life left to acquire all the comics I wanted.

Note to worried family members: this thought isn't to do with me suffering from some life threatening condition, its to do with the calculation that I'm probably not going to generate £30000 of disposable income in the next forty years to buy all the Eeries, Creepys, Avengers, Challengers of the Unknown, Tales of the Unexpecteds and Giant Size Fantastic Fours ( etc, etc, carries on in a similar vein for the next half hour ) that I think I deserve.

And what is disposable income when you've got kids -- the money you aren't using to send them on skiing holidays or to medical school ? I want the best for my kids more than I want Neal Adams Batman comics.

And I probably don't even have 40 years because am I still going to like comics when I'm 82 ? And how much will Sea Devils number six be selling for by then anyway ? Gah !!

Which leads in to the bigger question why do grown ups collect comics anyway ?

And by the way, I don 't think there's any chance of me reading 3000 books if I live to be 102. 

Wednesday 10th February

Finally we win a football game. West Ham beat eighth placed Birmingham 2-0.

Monday 8th February

Watched final part of Red Riding Trilogy last night. I enjoyed it and I want to start reading David Peace but it was too  disturbing. Yorkshire in the 80s seemed a very scary place to me as a teen and I was glad to escape to the safety of big London. These three films brought back too many bad memories.

Monday 1st February

Fifteen stone three is somewhere I don't want to be. No more chocolate or Rubicon Mango Juice for me. For a month anyway.
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We didn't get Ruud Van Nistelroy but we did get Benni McCarthy, Mido and Ilan. 'Nuff strikers.
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Spotify tunes tonight: Hot Chip and Leatherface.

Sunday 31st January

I really want to stop shouting at my kids. It doesn't seem to improve their behaviour.

Sunday 25th January

I had a very sore throat last night so drank four pints of Belhaven very quickly last night at Johnston's party. My throat feels much better but now my nose won't stop running.

Saturday 24th January

The Labour Party sent me a letter telling me to come along to the Labour Club last night to keep East Lothian Labour. Then they phoned. They really wanted me to be there.

Except it wasn't the Labour party. It was Anne Picking's supporters trying to disrupt the Delegates meeting that could lead to her deselection. I don't have strong feelings about whether Anne should be deselected but I feel ashamed that I was taken in.

Thursday 22nd January

We're owned by pornographers -- bad. We're signing Ruud Van Nistelroy -- good.
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Early morning despondency -- my change went bad. Early afternoon cheer -- I rescued someone else's bad change. It all balances out.
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Thursday night playlist.

Tuesday 19th January

Delivered today, the worst catalogue in the world ( the Next Directory ) and the best catalogue in the world ( Fantagraphics Winter 2010 Catalog ).

Monday 18th January

How come I didn't hear about these guys before ? I want Art of Jaime !

Thursday 14th January

In the spirit of reading 10 good books I stopped reading Reading Lolita in Tehran tonight, one of this month's reading group books. I am interested in both Iran (will there be a revolution this year ? ) and Nabokov, but this just isn't the right book for me. So I read the David Bowie article on Wikipedia instead.
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Jay Reatard, I'm sorry I didn't ever listen to your music while you were alive. Thanks to Spotify I now know you rocked.
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And it was a pretty terrible day in Johannesburg ...
  

Sunday 10th January

I want to read 10 good books this year -- meaning things that I really want to read from my list and not things from the reading group.  Things like:

• Apples by Richard Milward
• Times Arrow by Martin Amis
• Kieron Smith, Boy by James Kelman
• Henry Miller
• Richard Brautigan
• more Bukowski
• more Richard Yates

and other things I just haven't thought of yet.

Friday 8th January

Not in work because of the stupid snow and Scotrail cancelling trains again. Feeling very guilty.

Update: Scotrail have cancelled all the teatime trains from Glasgow back to Edinburgh. I guess I did the right thing this morning when I chose warm bed over cold platform.

Thursday 7th January

No train from Prestonpans to Edinburgh for at least 30 minutes. Platform bitterly cold. That's me back to bed.

16:00. England draw the third test at Cape Town. Hurrah !

Sunday 3rd January

Enjoyed Who Killed Nancy on DVD tonight. What a surprise to see Alan Jones from Forbidden Planet 2 talking to camera as a friend of Sid's.

Does this mean I am two degrees of separation from Sid Vicious or doesn't it count if you haven't seen your connection for 20 years ?

Friday 1st January

Goals for the year:

• work as much as I can
• pass the AIX certification exam
• refresh my wardobe
• write 200 blog posts ( some hope, I hear you say )
• weigh less than 14 stone ( likewise )
• do 10 press-ups (in one session, not during the whole year)
• read 10 good books
• oh, and be a good parent and boyfriend

Just one resolution: stop saying "You've done good" and start saying "You've done well."

I've given up on ever stopping picking my nose.

Happy New Year everyone !

Thursday 13th August

My mum makes this and Winter Salad and claims it as a great Yorkshire tradition:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2009/aug/01/family-life

I thought she might have got something a bit wrong, but it seems she's not the only one. Still, try finding another reference to it on Google.

Wednesday 12th August

Best birthday ever ! Enjoyed scallops, Pimms and Pleiades, all for the first time.

Received new Cornershop album, best of Melanie, nineteenth century literature, laser pointer and pyjama trousers with comic panels on. Thanks girls.

Sunday 5th July

Another Nigel hour, another blog post. Will I make 300 this year ?

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Listening to Bad Moon Rising, the start of my grand Sonic Youth listening project.

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7pm and its still too darn hot. Hottest week ever and back to work tomorrow.

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Overheard on the train: "You went to see Shakira ?"
"No, Chick Corea."

Sunday 22nd February

Nigel hour on a very pleasant Sunday. The weather is nice, we've been out and done the Wallyford Elephans geocache  which has previously eluded us. I have mad dhal for tomorrow's Maha Shivatri feast. We had mushrooms, split peas and rotis for lunch inspired by this recipe. The kids are tidying their rooms and I am listening to Murmur by REM -- very chilled.

Saturday 21st February

I hate Bolton. I'm sorry but its true. As usual they beat us. Bolton Wanderers 2 - West Ham 1. We had the best of the second half but they had scored twice at  the start of the first.

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Georgie is getting too clever. She was winding up Lucy who  was sat in the Lidl trolley, so I told Lucy to ignore her, but by the time we got to the end  of the aisle I was wound  up too. I started telling  her and she said "I thought you said to ignore me."

Georgie has started saying "That's why" at the start of each sentence, even if it doesn't make any sense. She comes running in from the garden shouting "That's why I need the toilet !". That's why we love her so much.  

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Watched Penny Serenade, an old Cary Grant film I hadn't  seen before. I liked all the new baby bits and was greetin' by the end.

Thursday 19th February

You could tell that Allen Stanford was a baddie. Take your hands off our cricketers' wives and take your fat smug grin off my tv. Let the FBI find him soon and lock him away for a long, long time.

Friday 13th February

Server down all day.  Yup, its Friday the 13th.

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Reading project going well this year. I've just finished Denise Mina's Retribution, which sorted out the two villains from Garnethill and Exile and another one as well. Good stuff.

Sunday 1st February

Nigel hour and I am listening to the Associates Singles CD 2. I missed the start of the Associates career, being just a wee boy, but then I liked Party Fears Two and Country Club.  In sixth form my pal Simon liked Waiting  For The Loveboat, which I couldn't really  see, but then at Forbidden Planet I really liked their version of Heart of Glass. Poor old Billy Mckenzie.

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Recent  readings:

Glue by Irvine Welsh -- four Edinburgh boys, a bit younger than the Trainspotting boys get into football violence, petty crime, booze, drugs, etc. but after 20 years and 400 pages they are redeemed by their friendship and their parent's values. The message about male parenting is well made and the book is a lot  of  fun once it gets past the unpleasantness of the boys' teenage years in 1980 -- Juice Terry and Uncle Alex are among Irvine's strongest characters and I'm now looking forward to seeing Terry again in Porno.

Saturday 31st January

More sleep disturbances. This morning the Next delivery man delivered my trousers at the ungodly hour of 08:20. I have never been so asleep while awake as I tried to make my way down the stairs and sign for the goods through the tiny tunnel of my vision.

When I got back to bed I remembered that I had been dreaming about Jan and I praising Lucy. Jan remembered that she had been dreaming about us arguing.

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West Ham win football matches faster than I blog -- or at least not losing. Last Saturday we beat Hartlepool in the Cup, then on Wednesday we beat Hull 2-0. Today we drew 0-0 at Arsenal which puts us in a rather comfortable eighth place.

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Film club: the Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou -- we really liked the Darjeeling Limited so I had high hopes for this. While not quite as Darjeeling this is a very smart, funny film. Enjoyed the dopey undersea effects and Bill Murray's battles with Philipino pirates

Sunday 25th January

Film club: a trashy couple of weeks in which I enjoyed:

the War of the Worlds -- in which Tom Cruise demonstrates how tough it can be coping with your kids during a martian invasion

X-Men 3 -- Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellen shine again, shame about Vinnie

Funny Games -- Yuppies in peril, ... from posh kids, ... with clever, clever speaking to camera bits. I like this film

Wednesday 21st January

Our sleep was disturbed last night by various mis-set alarm clocks. This led to some good bad dreams.
 
Nigel's dream: One of the kids has left their pink coat in long grass. I want to retrieve the coat but something in the grass is filling me with dread. Then it moves -- its a giant rabbit ! Aargh !

Lucy's dream: She is bouncing on the trampoline and  crabs and lobsters are nipping her ! Aaargh !

Sunday 18th January

I tramp around Glasgow all afternoon. West Ham beat Fulham 3-1. Goals from David Di Michele, Mark Noble and Carlton Cole. Bellamy doesn't play. Eighth place.

Sunday 11th January

Having a car drive through your fence is quite a stressful start to the day. Finding your locked garage door has somehow blown open doesn't help.

In these circumstances Fairtrade Fruit and Nut and Bambus are a deserved treat.
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Menu plans for this week:

• Mon -- curried chicken
• Tue -- stovies
• Wed -- harvest festival -- roast vegetables and couscous
• Thu -- Martin Luther King day -- black-eyed peas and rice
• Fri -- black pudding, egg, potato, apple

Saturday 10th January

Film club: This week we watched The Sweet Smell of Success and  Mike Leigh's Career Girls. The Sweet Smell of Success is about how corrupting work can be. Gay, wordy Burt Lancaster is a newspaper columnist and master of all he surveys from his New York apartment, but his scheming costs. Tony Curtis wants in to this world, plays the game but loses everything.

Career Girls hasn't really got anything to do with work. Its about two girls meeting years after sharing a flat in the 80s.  I love Mark Benton -- why doesn't he do more acting and less comedy ? -- Katrin Cartlidge does a brilliiant Thewlis twitchy aggression and Andy  Serkis and Joe Tucker are suitably horrible. Student life in the 80s was lousy and grey and this film really catches that in the girls' flashbacks.

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Newcastle 2 - West Ham 2. Goals from Craig Bellamy with an assist from Scott Parker and Carlton Cole ( four goals in four ). Tenth place.

Friday 9th January

Of course I agree with this column by Alexander Chancellor, but it doesn't make it any easier to get up in the morning. 

Thursday  8th January

At  Haymarket this morning two members of station staff got on the train to give some girl a telling off. "If you do that again you won't be allowed to travel", "Is a newspaper worth more than your life ?"
The girl was very sorry and explained it was her mobile phone, not just her Metro and she wouldn't do it again. I've no idea what she had done.

When I got on the train this evening a young boy ( 12,  14 -- I don't  know ) was marching around, punching seats and hanging from rails. I of course was too troubled to do anything except keep my eyes in my book. He then started shouting at people to close the door after them, not swearing but using silly words like mong like Jonah out of Summer Heights High.
At this point someone did intervene. A man in  a grey suit and pink tie went over to the boy, sat right in his space and said something to him which seemed to get through, the only bit of which that I caught was "You don't  speak to people like that." What  a hero.
Unfortunatly when this guy got off he was on his mobile phone and left his shopping, two bottles of milk, one green, one blue on the train. The lady opposite me who had been most impressed by his handling of the bad boy tried to get his attention but it was too late.
I considered taking the milk home but thought it would be bad karma.
When I got home we were short of milk.

Monday 5th January

My favourite books that I read last year:

• The Ragged Trousered Philanthropists: Everything you hear about this book is true -- it will turn you socialist. Capitalism is a system for people with money to exploit people without money and that is as true in 2009 as it was in 1910
• George Orwell Essays: Orwell writes with integrity and clarity that inspires; covering the politics of the Second World War, literary appreciation, hanging out with tramps, killing elephants and men and the power of language
• The Moor's Last Sigh: My wife recommended Salman and now we are both fans. History, allegory and wordplay fantasy in Twentieth Century Bombay

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What a relief -- all this anxiety isn't just me. Link.

Sunday 4th January

We're in the news -- Link. But will there be a Prestonpandemonium this year ? I'm afraid probably not.

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Menu plans for this week:

• Mon -- bespoke pasta
• Tue -- fishcakes and mung beans
• Wed -- Emily's sausage and bean casserole
• Thu -- Elvis's birthday: burgers, buns and peanut butter
• Fri -- rolls and bacon

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For the first time in years I don't have to make a mad dash to the bank on the first work day of the new year to try and shore up our ailing finances. We must be doing something right ...

Saturday 3rd January

West Ham 3 - Barnsley 0. FA Cup Third Round. Barnsley had made it to the semi finals last year. Result of the day: Nottingham Forest beat Man City 3-0 in Manchester. We get Hartlepool away next time.

A good Christmas for West Ham after beating Stoke 2-1 at home and Portsmouth 4-1 away. Tenth in the league.

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Nice rice lunch for Vasanth Panchami. We all wore yellow and ate Co-op frozen Indian snacks and rotis. We didn't  have lentils so I substituted quinoa. Recipe here.

Thursday 1st January

Happy New Year everyone. I hope its a good one, without any fear.

Jan and I had a wonderfully quiet night in, the best New Year I can remember. We didn't watch any hootenany tv, we didn't step outside and greet the neighbours, we didn't watch the fireworks out of the window -- we just had a nice cup of tea.

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And so to the resolutions:

• everyone tells me I should do some exercise, so this year I shall. It would be nice to be able to do a press up
• and eat less -- that would be good as well
• and still on the health and fitness front, I shall look after my teeth better as well
• I am going to try and be less anxious about stuff -- especially work. Here's me chilling out
• I am going to save money
• I am going to write 300 blog postings
• I am not going to read any Marvel comics for a whole year
• I am going to stop picking my nose -- yes I know, I say it every year
• and I am going to try and pay a bit more attention when other people are speaking -- no more zoning out meeting new people
• and be courteous to strangers, that must be good karma -- No, after you
• and listen to more cool tunes -- good music is so uplifting
• and buy something nice for Jan next Christmas

Tuesday 30th December

The books I want to read this year:

• the next Rebus -- which for me is Tooth and Nail
• Richard Brautigan -- who I've never read, but seems to be highly regarded
• Irvine Welsh -- who I haven't read in seven years
• Henry Miller -- recommended in Orwell's essay
• the third part of Denise Mina's Garnethill trilogy
• JG Ballard -- who I've never read
• William Burroughs -- also never read
• Alasdair Gray -- who I enjoy
• Salman Rushdie -- who I also enjoy
• James Kelman -- I enjoyed How Late It Was, but never read anything else
• Gulliver's Travels
• Peter Ackroyd
• A Streetcar Named Desire

Sunday 14th December

I enjoyed the Blondie documentary on BBC2 last night. Seeing Mick Jones on Chris Stein's New York Underground radio show got me to thinking about the similarity of the careers of Blondie and the Clash. They both started off punk. They both lusted after New York cool. They both started  making different souding records. These records were their biggest hits. And then they stopped.

Monday 1st December

Comics I want to read next year:

• Laika -- by my old FP pal Nick Abadzis

• Buddha

• Jack Kirby's Fourth World -- in those black, white and greyscale editions from the late 90s

• Kitchen Sink's Comic Strip Century -- I've only had it on the shelf for ten years

• the Smithsonian Book of Newspaper Comics -- erm, I've only had it for 20 years
• Posy Simmonds
• Kim Deitch
• Love and Rockets
• Crumb

And no Marvels !!

Sunday  30th December

Great Clariion blog here -- I love those old arrays.

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Menu plans for this week:

• Monday -- polenta, sardines, cheese, italian beans
• Tuesday  -- couscous with vegetable tagine. Link here
• Wednesday -- dhal, indian snacks, rice
• Thursday -- mushroom risotto
• Friday -- noodles, tuna

Saturday 29th November 2008

Anthon Berg's Grape in Muscat Wine -- the best chocolates ever. Happpy birthday Jan!

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I have always considered myself a Fall fan, despite a fifteen year break since last having seen them play live and having their latest album Imperial Wax Solvent out of the library twice without ever daring to play it.

But I was excited this week waiting for the delivery of their 2004 compilation album, 50,000 Fall Fans Can't Be Wrong: 39 Golden Greats, now at the bargain price of £4.98, and I wasn't disapointed. Disc two plays as I write. Er Free Range Er!

Sunday 9th November 2008

Listened to the first Clash album while doing chores with the girls. Lucy improvised the lyric "Bad boys like it, bad boys like it" to White Riot, which might just be an improvement on the original.

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Menu plans for this week:

Monday: couscous and sardines

Tuesday: sausages and cabbages -- it's Poland day !

Wednesday: pasta, butter beans and pesto

Thursday: tuna lasagne

Friday: pizza

Saturday 8th November 2008

The girls are at a party so its difficult music morning -- Killing Joke, the Pop Group, Ian Dury, the Who and Big Black.

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West Ham 1, Everton 3. West Ham concede three goals in the last ten minutes. Just one point in the last six games leaves us 13th.

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Simple Italian bean soup: chop half an onion, a clove of garlic and some leek and gently fry. Drain a large tin of butter beans and add to the pan along with a large tin of chopped tomato. Add a squirt of tomato puree and two vegetable stock cudes. Add water, bring to boil and simmer. The longer you simmer, the better the soup.

Tuesday 4th November 2008

As regular readers will know I am very sentimental about the 18 months I worked in a comic shop back in the 80s. Whenever Jan and I watch Jonathon Ross on a Friday night I think of him as a sort of estranged friend based on the few occasions I spoke to him in Forbidden Planet, including the time I sold him a copy of Heroes, Inc. Presents, the United States Services Overseas comic produced by Wally Wood and Steve Ditko in 1969.

My sales pitch made reference to this panel:

The postman brought me a copy yesterday which seemed rather timely considering the election in the USA today and the recent troubles JR has gotten himself in to.

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Jan and I just sat through Liverpool playing Athletico Madrid in the Champions League. Spawny Liverpool won a very soft penalty in the 95th minute to force a draw. Football is indeed a cruel mistress.

Liverpool do very well in the Champions League, considering that they haven't actually been champions of England for 18 years.

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Listening to right now: Juliette and the Licks, on loan from the library.

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And if you're only going to buy your husband one maths book this Christmas make it this one -- A Mathematician's Apology namechecked by Marcus du Sautoy in the Guardian yesterday.

Monday 3rd November 2008

Enjoyed this column in the paper last week -- http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2008/oct/29/youngpeople-childprotection

I think she's absolutely right -- society is obsessed with sex, buying pointless things, and how to eat and drink incessantly without getting fat and if we don't want to pass those values on to our kids then we have to sort ourselves out.

Saturday 25th October 2008

Useful Unix links:

How to Apache working in Solaris 10 -- http://www2.petervg.nl/cgi-bin/docs.cgi?a=read&doc=83

AIX crib sheet -- http://www.unixguide.net/ibm/ibmcribsheet.shtml

Tuesday 21st October 2008

A fortnight ago we started watching Sunshine and it was a treat to see Steve Coogan and Craig Cash back on the television. Tonight's final part was just a reminder of why we never watch television drama.

Saturday 18th October 2008

So much to blog, so little time. I have a little book full of ideas to blog, but some of them aren't too topical any more. Capello to recall Heskey -- hot news a week ago.

England have won twice, West Ham have lost twice (blimmin' Bolton and Hull), the world almost ended with the Large Hadron Collider and then it nearly ended again with the greedy bankers, but then Gordon sorted it all out.

The government have started dropping all the policies that people can't stand like testing for 13 year old and locking people up for six weeks without a trial.

The Times gave away a CD of Closer by Joy Division, just in case their readers weren't feeling depresed enough -- Is this the crisis I knew had to come ?

We watched Three and Out and Cloverfield. We have been fans of Colin Meaney since Layer Cake and he was the best thing in Three and Out. Cloverfield was a good trailer -- you can imagine the pitch, "It's like Godzilla meets Blair Witch". Next on the list is Teorema with Terence Stamp -- black and white, subtitles, old -- much more like it.

I finished reading Low Life by Luc Sante and A Journey to the End of the Russian Empire by Anton Chekhov. Gotta love that nineteenth century, whether it be the Irish underworld of New York, written 12 years before Scorsese's film, or the Russian prison island of Sakhalin, the Tsar's very own Australia but colder.

Sunday 28th September 2008

I sometimes wonder why I collect comics -- what are they for ? Would the time I spend reading the Avengers or Tomb of Dracula be better spent learning better Perl, or maths, or reading Granta, or writing something myself ? Or is it downtime that could never be used in any constructive way ?

And then I stumble on this reminder of why reading comics isn't just a waste of time -- http://www.comicsreporter.com/index.php/fifty_things_that_every_great_comics_collection_needs_to_have/

Saturday 20th September 2008

Fulham 1, West Ham 2. Goals for Cole and Etherington. Fifth place.

Wednesday 24th September 2008

Watford 1, West Ham 0. Another September exit from the League Cup.

Tuesday 23rd September 2008

Never a dull moment. Some panel of judges has decided West Ham owe Sheffield United compensation for getting relegated last year.

Sunday 21st September 2008

Film club -- this week we watched:

There Will Be Blood -- Like most long films we rent this sat in its envelope for weeks. Then we came up with the plan of watching it over two nights, but once we started watching, it felt like no time at all. I liked all the deaf bits, like there being no dialogue for the first five minutes and the Johnny Greenwood heartbeat music when the focus is on HW. And driven Daniel Day Lewis was brilliantly compelling and ambiguous.

--

Tidy up playlist: Patti Smith, the Toy Dolls, Man 2 Man, the Crusaders.

Saturday 20th September 2008

West Ham 3, Newcastle 1. Two goals for David di Michele, the new Paolo. Newcastle without a manager and everyone wanting to bail. West Ham in sixth place.

Monday 15th September 2008

Jan and I both just finished Transgressions Volume 3 which I had on loan from the library. I used to be a big snob about crime writing, ( I don't read genre fiction except for horror, science fiction and erm, comics. Hmmm ), but now I really enjoy Ian Rankin, Denise Mina and I the four stories in this anthology.

Sunday 14th September 2008

Film club -- this week we watched:

Gangster #1 -- We like Thewlis and we like gangster films, so this was a winner. Brilliant camped up ending with Blackpool's other acting great, Malcolm McDowell really getting to grips with the mania that can drive someone to want be the boss.

Bigger Than Life -- Nicholas Ray's next film after Rebel Without a Cause. Slightly mad workaholic James Mason ( Yorkshire's finest Hollywood actor ) is prescribed brand new ( in 1956 ) drug Cortisone for his rare blood condition, goes on a huge ego trip and terrorises his family and colleagues. Brilliant !

Saturday 13th September 2008

West Brom 3, West Ham 2. Ashton injured once again.

--

Got a very sharp haircut at Truva Barbers in Dundas Street, Glasgow. Ear hair burnt off with a taper, which was a new experience.

Sunday 7th September 2008

Film club: Last night we watched Quadrophenia, which I have never seen before, though I have seen the end before -- Sting the bellboy -- ha ha !

Phil Daniels concludes that this mod thing isn't really for him. Like Ray Davis he's not like everybody else. Whatever happened to Keep On Keeping On ?

Must have been a lot of fun to be in for all those young actors and must have been a lot of fun to see back in 1980 like half my school ...

Saturday 6th September 2008

I am ashamed of my hungoverness. Never again, and all that.

Wednesday 3rd September 2008

So, Curbs has left us. We weren't as rich as we thought we were and like Newcastle we have had to sell good players ( Anton Ferdinand and George McCartney ) and like Newcastle it has been too much for the gaffer.

I don't know who I want to take over, but if it was Slaven Bilic it might at least do England a favour.

Tuesday 2nd September 2008

Film night: Tonight we watched Requiem for a Dream. I liked Aronofsky's Pi when I saw it many years ago, and Jan and I had seen Hubert Selby Jr's Last Exit to Brooklyn many, many years ago.

I enjoyed the cut ups and percussion and repetition but the last ten minutes were too unpleasant for my delicate soul. I remember now that the close of Last Exit was equally disturbing.

Wednesday 27th August 2008

Really enjoyed The Lady From Shanghai on DVD last night. When we have a worthy old film to watch we sometimes don't get around to watching it for weeks, which is a shame because old films are just great. I loved the strangeness of this film, particularly the fun house at the end, the mad court scene and the camp villains Everett Sloane and Glenn Anders ("Just tell 'em you're taking a little tarrrr-get practice."

Orson Welles' Irish accent made me wonder why there weren't any first generation Irish actors in Hollywood to play all these Irish characters. Who was the first Irishman to play Irish on screen ?

Friday 1st August 2008

The Zinefest last Saturday was a lot of fun and made me want to put more effort in to selling stuff, just so I can stock Stuart Murray and Olly Paterson.

Stuart is a postman, a teddy boy and a chronicler of Glasgow's rough pubs in In Pubs. I'm sure he is going to be a big star. I'm not sure if he thinks what he does has anything to do with comics, but I do.

Anyway, tonight I found myself stuck in Waverley station for an hour and decided that I deserved a pint. I bought my drink, but all the tables were at least partially occupied. I sat next to John, who was just like someone out of Stuart's book. At first I was a bit scared, when he asked me if I was of the Rangers persuasion, but when I told him I worked in the NHS he warmed to me ("I love Gordon Brown").

I couldn't always tell what he was saying so I can't really document his crazy, booze addled conversation, but I was reminded of how much time I spent talking to scary, bonkers people in pubs when I was younger.

Thursday 31st July 2008

We want David for our leader. Link.

Sunday 6th July 2008

We all enjoyed our day day out in Carlisle yesterday, a bit like a day trip to Coronation Street, everyone we met being so friendly.

The first thing we saw off the train was the record fair at the County Hotel, and the first stall we saw was all punk rock -- the Adicts, Crass, the Damned etc. etc. The music playing in the hall was the Rich Kids, Elvis Costello and the Jam, which made me think the punk rock guy was in charge of the tape machine, but then on came Kokomo by the Beach Boys. How do they decide who is in charge of the tunes ?

I bought No. 1 Rare Groove Hits for £3. Bargain !

And Carlisle has more punks than Gorgie. Is Carlisle the most punk rock town in the UK ?

Sunday 29th June 2008

This just in from the humour can be funny department: Did you know Beth Ditto's dad invented the shorthand for representing repeated entries in a column ?

Glastonbury really rocked my Sunday. May the BBC long continue to cover this great national treasure of ours. And with that clever blue button you never have to suffer Biffy Clyro when you could be watching Mark Ronson.

Friday 20th June 2008

One consequence of commuting fifty miles to work is that I can be a bit too tired to blog in the evening. Another consequence us that I do get loads of time to read. I can now read a book in a week.

This week I read Garnethill by Denise Mina, an amazing, intense read about murder and abuse in Glasgow, just what you need for the 08:00 from Waverley to Queen Street.

Sunday 27th April 2008

My pick of the weekend's papers -- this review of the new James Kelman. I really enjoyed How Late It Was, How Late, but I agree that this exercise in natural kid language might be "great when dipped into at random, but [...] intolerably wearisome when tackled at length".

Wednesday 23rd April 2008

A fire alarm, a patient in handcuffs and poop in the corridor -- just another day in the NHS. It wasn't like this at the Royal Marsden ;-)

Saturday 19th April 2008

I've got my right arm back after four days of excruciating pains. Thank you Ibuprofen Heat Patches.

--

We all enjoyed Dr Who tonight. Emily came up with a good name for the Ood's facial appendages -- tonguetacles.

Friday 18th April 2008

Today I voluntarily walked away from a job where I was quite contented for only the second time. Goodbye ST Microelectronics.

Saturday 12th April 2008

A successful trip to the Glasgow Comic Fair -- 118 comics for £70.

Sunday 6th April 2008

I am just so incredibly happy about my new job.

Saturday 5th April 2008

The Guardian Guide were a bit mean about Russell T Davies' writing today. I thought tonight's first episode was most excellent. And I think there's a lot of chemistry between Catherine Tate and David Tennant. And I thought Sarah Lancashire made a rather good villain. And usually I find her really annoying. And I usually find Catherine Tate really annoying. So well done Russell and the BBC !

Friday 4th April 2008

I passed a phone interview and I have a new job. Starting on 21st April in Glasgow. Interviewing for your next job really is much easier when you're still in work. Gah ! I'm just so happy.

Thursday 3rd April 2008

Really enjoyed this article in the National Geographic. We usually assume stuff from China is so cheap because they are evil and care nought for human rights and have child slavery. But at least part of that cheapness is down to the huge scale of things over there. Imagine a whole city given over to making buttons. Or playing cards. Wow !

Monday 31st March 2008

I saw this rather disturbing story on the cover of the Metro this morning -- One sausage a day ups cancer risk. Gah ! I like bacon and sausages. Maybe I should have stayed a vegetarian ;-)

I love the canteen at work, but top of the menu today was Kilted Sausages. And what are the kilts made of ? Bacon. Don't they read the newspapers ?

Sunday 30th March 2008

My favourite story from the weekend's papers -- Organic food 'no benefit to health' in the Observer. I always knew dirty carrots were a waste of money.

Saturday 29th March 2008

Selling comics to the art lovers of Leith for seven hours was an exhausting, but rewarding experience. I had a rather unrealistic sales target in my head, but it felt good selling some of my small press faves like Bedsit Journal, Five Days out of Seven and the Blackest Gnome.

Like the hapless Apprentice candidates selling fish I did just about manage to break even, but I think I probably enjoyed the experience a bit more. If I wanted to "Make money, make money and make more money" I probably wouldn't be selling comics -- now that would be a good Apprentice challenge, "I want you to choose three of these self-published comics and sell them at an Arts Fair in Edinburgh".

Thanks to Out of the Blue for a very well organised fair.

Thursday 20th March 2008

The journalism in Private Eye isn't always of that much interest to me, but I was quite interested in this story about the dogs who found traces of Maddie in the McCann's car and buried bodies in Jersey -- or did they ? Link here.

Thursday 13th March 2008

Best day off ever -- I took the kids to school and nursery for the first time in ages, bought them books at the School Book Fair, ate loads of my wife's traybake, worked on Prestonpandemonium, and my laptop suddenly works a whole lot better now it has an extra 256MB of RAM.

Thursday 28th February 2008

Thursday night is skills night. This week I spent my time looking at some problems in Perl and awk.

1. Use awk to only write lines where column 3 matches a pattern or is greater than a value

$ cat test.txt | awk '$3==3 {print }'

$ cat test.txt | awk '$3=="text" {print }'

$ cat test.txt | awk '$3>3 {print }' | awk '$3<9999 {print }'

$ cat test.txt | awk '$3>3 {print }' | awk '$3<"a" {print }'

$ cat test.txt | awk '$3~"ex" {print }'

2. Use Perl to only write lines where column 3 matches a pattern or is greater than a value

$ cat test.txt | ./column_match.pl

#!/usr/bin/perl
while ($line = <STDIN>) {
($col1, $col2, $col3, $therest) = split(" ",$line);
$col3 > 3 and print "$col1 $col2 $col3 $therest \n";
}

#!/usr/bin/perl
while ($line = <STDIN>) {
($col1, $col2, $col3, $therest) = split(" ",$line);
$col3 =~ "ex" and print "$col1 $col2 $col3 $therest \n";
}

3. Use awk to average the values in a column

$ cat test.txt | awk 'BEGIN { count=0; total=0 } {if (($3+0)==$3) count++; total+=$3} END {print "Average ", total/count }'

4. Use Perl to average the values in a column

$ cat test.txt | ./average.pl

#!/usr/bin/perl
$count = 0;
$total = 0;
while ($line = <STDIN>) {
($col1, $col2, $col3, $therest) = split(" ",$line);
$col3 > 0 and $total += $col3 and $count++;
} $average = $total / $count;
print "Average $average\n";

Tuesday 5th February 2008

We were all looking forward to Pancake Day. I came home, put some oil in the frying pan, turned up the heat, put milk in the jug, added flour, ... now for the eggs. Except we have no eggs -- they all got used on Yorkshire Pudding Day. D'oh !

Monday 4th February 2008

And lo the IT gods did decree that a server would come falling out of the sky with an almighty crash. I have often seen servers bent all out of shape from being dropped but today I was the one doing the dropping.

Sunday 3rd February 2008

I still had 133 to dispose when I sat down at my laptop tonight, but 90 minutes later I have made it -- zero inbox heaven and a day ahead of my target date. Hurrah !

Wednesday 16th January 2008

What I feel about football makes no sense. I have no grudge against Sam Allardyce or Newcastle United but when he got the sack last week I said 'Har har !'

Tonight when Kevin Keegan got the job Jan predicted that tears would be shed, and by half time in tonight's MOTD ( West Ham's 1-0 FA Cup 4th round defeat away to Man City -- ho hum ) she was proved right.

Tuesday 15th January 2008

We've been desparatly watching films to try and run down our LOVEFiLM queue and get Sopranos Series 6 Part 2 despatched. Sunday was Being There and last night was Little Otik

Being There was Peter Sellars last film and a fitting tribute to his great comic acting talent as he plays the grown up little boy lost in the world of Washington poverty and politicking.

Jan Svankmajer is everyone's favourite Czech stop-go animator and Little Otik is the story of a couple who really want a baby but get a monster made of wood.

--

My favourite columns from the weekend's papers: Nick Cohen on why environmentalists might suffer a downturn in their fortunes if the economy turns sour -- here; and Jay Rayner on why we can't all afford organic chicken for dinner -- here.

Saturday 12th January 2008

Today was Barker family funday, so we went swimming, made trifle and watched the The Simpsons Movie. All us Barkers are big fans of the Simpsons ( or the yellow people as our children like to call them in an annoying show of cuteness ), but Georgie had fallen asleep by this point so she missed out on popcorn and Lidl pretzels. I enjoyed the film but felt it didn't quite meet my very high expectations or live up to its trailer, which we also watched tonight.

In the run up to Christmas Channel 4 showed the very first season of the show and I enjoyed that early, crude animation style. The computer animation in the film is very slick ( like Futurama ), but a bit busy for the small screen and without some of the underground comics feel of the 1989 version.

To complete our perfect day West Ham beat Fulham 2-1, Lawrie Grant ordered two tables at Prestonpandemonium III and I sit here eating something called Baumkuchedn-spitzen, which is basically tiramisu in chocolate.

Manchester United beat Nigel Pearson's Newcastle 6-0 so it should be a good Match of the Day in the morning.

Friday 11th January 2008

I recently finished reading Tomasson and Buist's Battles of the '45, an excellent overview of the whole Jacobite campaign, with good coverage of our very own battle of Prestonpans. With much of its research coming from British Army records it provides what I consider a balanced account, but then I am English.

So, Cope was a good general, who did everything he could at Prestonpans ( as his military tribunal found ), but he was let down by the quality of his troops. I don't know why this should be so important to me 262 years later, but I feel much more comfortable reading this than reading that the highlanders were great soldiers, their leaders inspired in their plan to outflank the redcoats and Cope an incompetent who had to lead away his men in shame.

--

Tonight we watched Reverend and the Makers play out the Jonathan Ross show and it occured to me I can no longer tell the difference between real pop music and the joke pop music they have in the Mighty Boosh. I really am a 40 years old dad.

Thursday 10th January 2008

Nigel vs. email.

I have an embarrassing 508 messages in my inbox -- my friends at lifehacker would be ashamed of me. So my plan is to reduce this number by 20 a day. Come back in 25 days time ( 4th February ) when I will have achieved the fabled zero inbox.

Saturday 5th January 2008

Watched M. Night Shyamalan's The Village tonight on the BBC. I first had this film explained to me a couple of years ago -- I had missed its cinematic release completely -- but it sounded too silly to ever make it in to our DVD queue.

Apparantly the plot is lifted from an old Twilight Zone and the twist is staring you right in the face ( hey, what's the most ironic explanation for how this situation could come to pass ? Well, that's what has happened ), but it was still a suitably distracting way to pass 100 minutes on a Saturday night.

Wednesday 2nd January 2008

Happy new year everyone. As is traditional, some resolutions:

• drink more booze -- Jan and I have become such lightweights
• appreciate Scotland more -- I've chosen to live here after all
• stop taking sugar in coffee and don't eat a ton of chocolate to celebrate the kids going to bed each night
• listen to the radio more -- its less distracting than dumb telly
• enjoy the kids more -- weekends are for riding bikes and swimming, not tidying bedrooms and reading about cricket
• and be less pissy with the kids -- they're learning to be pissy and sarcastic from a master
• ... and perennial favourites, stop picking my nose, make more of an effort to keep in touch with friends and family and blog more often !

Saturday 22nd December 2007

I was really looking forward to eleven days of being a full time parent and husband ... right up until it was time to walk the kids round to a neighbour's house for some pre Christmas cheer. Regular readers of my wife's blog will know that Georgie has can be quite strong willed when it comes to walk time, but I hadn't really experienced this for a while and today there was no Jan for backup. Georgie wanted to wear mittens and carry a Christmas card to post in the letter box. Unfortunatly Georgie wasn't able to carry the Christmas card while wearing the mittens. Raised voices followed and in shame I abandoned the mission. Jan deals with this sort of situation five days a week, so half an hour later we set out again, this time with both parents providing the escort.

Now this is the sort of parenting failure that can really get me down, but today I learned a vital lesson. Actually Jan drew me a diagram and spelt it out in simple language -- when I'm miserable and grumpy all my little friends are miserable and grumpy.

Post script: the Christmas card never did make it in to the post -- sorry Angela.

Saturday 1st December 2007

Selling comics to the people of Prestonpans is a bit like teaching crows to fly underwater -- a lifetime's work that produces little in the way of results. Today I was at the Pennypit Centre for the PSNYC Christmas Fayre. Due to conflicting reports of when the kick off would be, and our busy day ( three Christmas fairs, two as punters and one as a vendor ), I arrived with my suitcase of comics and newspaper bags in a room already mobbed with women and small children.

The kind lavender bag ladies showed me to my pitch, stuck conveniently behind the queue for the tombolla. Parents tend to steer their kids away as if I am trying to sell them drugs or pornography ( I'm not ), but despite everything I did manage to make five sales, and hey, I enjoy the challenge.

Sunday 12th August 2007

And so I am 40.

I have a very sunburnt face from this afternoon's barbecue at Yellowcraigs beach. It was really nice to see the kids playing on a traditional sandy beach. We hadn't packed towels or swimming costumes because the forecast was for rain. The raincoats came in handy later as we walked the mile or so back to North Berwick in pouring rain. Our plan was to walk the John Muir way along the coast but as the path disappeared and the beach turned away from North Berwick we decided to take our chances crossing the North Berwick West Links. The path through the middle of the golf course proved much better going for the buggy than the beach but we knew we shouldn't really be there.

As we dragged our sodden children past some golfers practising their swings one of them commented on how it was lovely weather for a stroll. At least we weren't paying £150 for the pleasure.

Thanks to Jan and the girls for working so hard at making my birthday special.

Monday 2nd July 2007

A week ago I had no work, now I've got two contracts. Right now I've got eight days work ( with an ISP in Livingston ), and then next week I start a new three month contract with an electronics design shop in Edinburgh. Thank you everyone who kept the faith.

Friday 22nd June 2007

While I've been unemployed Life on Mars, the Apprentice and Celebrity Masterchef have all started and ended. Thankfully Channel 4 show no sign of running out of episodes of the Simpsons.

On Tuesday I interviewed at a big city council. I kind of got the impression that they weren't really considering me when they were saying things like 'Thanks for coming all this way.' Hey, it's not that far and anyway if I was working here I would be making this journey every day.

I have another interview this Tuesday, a bit closer to home.

I haven't always managed to maintain a positive outlook this last few months. Thank you Jan for helping me stick with it.

Monday 4th June 2007

Sometimes something so bizarre and wrong-headed happens that you wonder if the world will ever make sense again. Tonight the closing credits in Eastenders scrolled up the screen rather than flashing up in tasteful clumps of two or three. Is this dumbing down or an attempt by the production staff to go back to the glory days of the 1980s ?

Tuesday 15th May 2007

Personality test questionnaire based on Georgina's ABC book:

Apple or Doughnut ?
Bear or Eagle ?
Car or Egg ?
Flower or Hand ?
Goose or Iguana ?
Kitten or Lemon ?
Nuts or Oranges ?
Puppy or Penguin ?
Rabbit or Tractor ?
Strawberry or Umbrella ?
Vegetables or Watch ?
Wolf or Xylophone ?
Yawn or Zigzag ?
Yacht or Zero ?

Sunday 13th May 2007

So West Ham won and stayed in the Premership and Sheffield United lost and didn't. Well done Curbs, Tev and the rest of them.

Neil Warnock was the lowest paid manager in the Premiership. Sometimes you've got to be careful what you wish for ...

Saturday 12th May 2007

Links of the day:

101 ways to improve your blog

Five ways to improve your life -- Living within your means is a great idea, but it helps if you have some means ;-)

Friday 11th May 2007

On a Friday night Jan and I like to listen to Bob Dylan's Theme Time Radio Hour on Radio 6. Tonight's subject was booze and this song by Charles Aznovour (his first hit apparantly) has got be one of the darkest things I have ever heard. And its so obsure you need to go to a Bob Dylan fan site because it isn't in any of the usual lyrics sites.

I'm glad I don't hardly drink any more.

--

And was that the darkest episode of Eastenders ever or what ?

--

My favourite bit of this story which I'm sure will be all over the Internet in the next few days -- 'There was like a metal gate.'

--

In the style of Gordon Brown, 'Today I announce my candidacy for the position of Lecturer in Computing Technical Support at Jewel and Esk Valley College.'

--

And now for some good news and a subject close to my heart -- peace in Ireland. Who could ever have foreseen this happening ?

Thursday 10th May 2007

Tonight Emily and I made flaneur drawings inspired by this video ( first ten seconds blank -- stick with it ).

Lucy did her best ever picture of a person, with unfinished Sun by Emily.

Monday 7th May 2007

Just sometimes I'm funny #2 ...

Yesterday we were watching Calamity Jane on the tv. Jane sees Adelaide Adams on stage for the first time, and I say 'So they had that burlesque in the olden days then ? ' 

Arf arf.

--

Bonjour Christopher ! Enjoyez vous le Paris !

--

Website of the day -- like Napster used to be in the olden days, a place for folks to search for 'free' mp3s: http://www.g2p.org/

Saturday 28th April 2007

My helpful children: Jan is changing Lucy's nappy. Georgie runs across the room, throws a packet of nappies at Jan's head and declares 'There, that's better.'

--

The funny games my kids play: Lucy says 'Yeah', Georgie says 'No', Lucy says 'Yeah', Georgie says 'No'. Repeat for next half hour.

--

Wigan 0, West Ham 3 -- Don't ever give up believing.

--

Dr Who Evolution of the Daleks -- Worst episode ever ! I think they may be running out of dalek stories.

Wednesday 25th April 2007

Jan and I both had bad dreams last night that disturbed our sleep and prevented us getting started with the day this morning. I dreamt that the police were searching the house, and I had the thing they were after right in my pocket, and had to get out of the house to dispose of it, but always looking over my shoulder expecting someone to be watching me.

This is obviously open to a psychological interpretation, but actually I try really hard not to have anything to feel guilty about. Perhaps it had something to do with my late night peanut binge. I certainly felt like I had a dry roasted hangover this morning.

--

Lucy is a changed person this week. We always hoped that nursery would be a boost to her language skills but the effect on her confidence and the amount she speaks has been immediate. And she is very, very happy to be going to 'school' at last.

Thursday 19th April 2007

Finally I have a working web interface to our mp3 jukebox. Big thanks to mp3act -- you rock !

Now to find some way to tag the 1500 files that we have without ID3 tags ...

Wednesday 11th April 2007

Lucy and Georgie are ill. I still haven't got a job. A certain ennui fills the Monkey Loft.

The last few days felt like a proper holiday -- like the only reason I wasn't in work was because it was Easter. The Barker family treasure hunt on Good Friday was great fun if ultimately unsuccessful and swimming with Lucy on Saturday afternoon was a wonderful bonding experience and a rare chance to give one of my kids the exact thing they have been nagging me for.

Then Georgie got ill on Saturday night and Lucy got ill on Sunday night and neither of them are really better yet.

--

The final Life on Mars was a little disappointing. Sam chooses to live in his fantasy world because it feels more real to him than the real world. This isn't a legitimate choice for anyone living in the real world with real friends and family. I think the writers got it wrong. The truly satisfying ending would have been for Sam to leave the dreamworld behind forever, returning to the present with some ambiguity in the interpretation of his experience -- more like Tony Soprano's recent two episode trip to dreamland.

Thursday 5th April 2007

Yet another uplifting blog -- I mightn't have had any work for the past nine weeks but at least I gave blood without fainting yesterday.

I told my 'donor carer' that I had fainted last time and she checked my record and saw that I had been a bit faint my first time as well. What I didn't know is that it is three strikes and out -- if I faint again then they ain't going to take me again. What pressure ! If I'm going to get the top prize for 50 donations then I have to not faint at every one of the next 43.

Armed with this information I realised I had to be strong ... and I was. I've never felt so good after a donation.

Wednesday 4th April 2007

Last night's dream: I'm having a quiet few beers in Antigua with Shane Warne and Glenn McGrath. We're all coming to the end of our bowling careers but looking forward to our last few games in the World Cup. They reassure me that although I didn't get as many wickets as them I am still getting picked for England at the age of 39 so someone must really rate me.

I wake up feeling elated that I am still a part of the England team. I guess its a metaphor for all the good things in my life ( wife, children, friends, house ) and that sometimes you need to feel appreciated. Thank you Mr Sandman.

Saturday 17th March 2007

As a postscript to yesterday's outpouring of self pity, the real lesson of adulthood is of course that we just have to get on with it ... so, I continue to get up in the morning, apply for jobs, work on my skills and enjoy the time with my family.

You never know, I might get a call on Monday saying all this credit check nonsense has been a big mistake.

And West Ham might win at Ewood Park today.

You never can tell ...

Friday 16th March 2007

A single phone call can spoil your whole day. Lucy had done very well in her language tests at hospital and we were on the bus home when I get a call telling me I haven't really got a new job -- I've failed the credit check.

This is particularly galling because both Equifax and CIFAS say my credit report is good and anyone failing me is misreading it.

I think it was Public Enemy who summed it up best -- 'Those suckas have authority'

When you're working, and you have a beautiful family, and a big house, and you can pay all your bills, the world feels like a good place, and you try and sell your kids the idea that hard work will get them the things they want, and you can't really remember why you bought all those angry punk rock records when you were a kid.

But actually the things that make all this possible are very fragile, and Kafka and the rest of them were right, and if the gods of bureaucracy don't look upon you favourably there ain't nothing you can do about it.

And just to ram that last point home, developers have somehow got permission to build houses on the field behind my house, which will presumably spoil our view of the battle site and the railway and forever burden us with negative equity.

Thursday 15th March 2007

Just sometimes I'm funny ...

Me: What's your new reading book about ?
Em: The Romans. I think its the Romans. Its either Romans or Romance.
Me: Are they wearing sandals ?
Em: Yes.
Me: Its the Romans.

I've just finished reading Achtung Schweinehund: A Boy's Own Story of Imaginary Combat by Harry Thompson in just three days, some kind of record for slow reader me. The book is about Harry's hobby of collecting, painting and playing with toy soldiers, something which I was fairly interested in from about the ages of eight to 18. Fortunately I managed to see that this tragically uncool hobby wasn't for me shortly before I started working at Forbidden Planet and gave my life to comics.

One question arising from the book: Did FP really sell wargames out of the basement of Denmark Street ?

Saturday 10th March 2007

Lucy and I went to the Hillhead Comic Mart today, a round trip that took nine trains:

1. Prestonpans to Waverley
2. Waverley to Glasgow Queen Street -- boarded but cancelled
3. Waverley to Glasgow Queen Street -- changed at Falkirk because Lucy got ill, Lucy revived with fresh air and soft mints
4. Falkirk to Glasgow Queen Street
5. Glasgow low level to Hillhead
6. Hillhead back to Queen Street
7. Queen Street to Edinburgh Waverley
8. Waverley to Prestonpans -- boarded but train changed before departure Waverley to Prestonpans

• start using double hyphens for punctuation, like in Marvel comics
• stop picking my nose
• do another reading project, like last year's 12 books. This year I want to read another 12 worthy novels and erm, 300 old Marvel comics. I reckon that in two years I can read all the classic Marvel comics of the 60s and 70s
• stop ordering rubbish films from lovefilm.com. Also start getting some animes and other things that we can all watch as a family
• be a bit more relaxed about work -- consolidate my skills and try to enjoy myself a bit more
• blog more often
• update the design of this site and Monkey Loft Comics
• And perennial favourite, make more of an effort to keep up with friends and family

• Mezzanine by Massive Attack
• Technique by New Order
• The Brown Album by Orbital
• Translucent by Mudhoney

• The new six CD set of Fall sessions for the John Peel show. I try not to be a Fall obsessive but its not easy ...
• The new Stereolab collection of EP tracks - good value at £11.99 on Amazon
• Bizarro by the Wedding Present - Amazon thought I might like it and they're right, I do like it and somehow I don't have it
• Prince As and Bs collection - now cheap on Amazon. I didn't get this in the 90s because it was so expensive, but it isn't now. Now for a cheap release of Sign O' the Times
• The new Yo La Tengo collection

24th April 2005

Just enjoyed a very productive weekend. The house is tidy, the bathroom is finished and the grass is cut. No profound thoughts just now.

21st April 2005

Well, it had to happen. My ideas are just too good to languish in the dark corners of my mind so I had to start sharing them with you all in the world out there. Check back here regularly for details of what I'm listening to on my memory stick, what I'm reading, what I'm ranting about and what bonkers self help program I am trying to adopt now.